______________*****In nEeD Of MuSiC*****_____________

Monday, January 29, 2007

29th Jan 2007, Monday. 9.07 pm

Am trying to organise a days during chinese new year to meet up with some old pals in secondary school.. seriously.. i think secondary sch friends are really a great deal man.. compared to other friends from before that and after that, i doubt any can be better than them.. i just hope they will all have the same enthu mind to meet up as i am.. because to me, friends are really something that i really need alot.. because i dont like to be alone.. the feeling of loneliness really suck alot..

hmmm.. so where's the place, the time we will all meet up together again... the bonding of friendship... when will it take place...

5:08 AM

Saturday, January 27, 2007

28 Jan 2007 Sunday, 4.48am..

sigh... yet another meaningless week.. there's really nothing worth aiming for... not even my passion anymore... i just cant figure out how those people who pursue their dreams and gets it.. i just dunno how to do it.. i dunno what i can do to achieve my dreams.. dont even know what to do.. am like giving up on this already... really.. its sickening trying to find something to do everytime.. trying to get people out just to waste some time, doing things that are stupid..

am tired.. but just dont wanna sleep.. it literally took me about 15 mins to sleep ytd. was over at weihoong's house till 6am then went home..

Friday's concert was fantastic with my friends all there watching. Im really grateful to them for coming, wasting $10 just to sit there and watch me and my band playing. Although the songs that my band played isnt their type of music, they still come. Omg... haha.. really am happy..
Practising for one month just aiming for this 26th jan's concert, it really was a successful one. now i have nothing to aim for.. nothing to look forward for except my ORD date.. probably after that, i wont even know what i can do..

All i want now is to have a clique of friends who we can really share things, do things together and aiming for one thing, that is to strengthen the bond of our friendship.. but i guess it wont happen to me. i can only watch those anime and dream on.. because its totally impossible.. im always the one trying since secondary school to form a strong clique of friends. but i guess they just dont get it.. or am i the one who aint satisfied? it just dint work out for me to have really good and close friends. because my cliques of friends always just breaks up because of their schedule... who dont even try to find time.. hmmm... but who cares anyway.. through those times, ive already create in myself the "Heck care" mindset.. still building up this wall to block the compassion in me.. stopping the flow of love, care and concern for others... who cares about anything.. who cares about me... so yea.. fuck all...

~~PEACE OUT~~
!~JORDON~!

12:49 PM

Thursday, January 25, 2007

25th Jan2007, Thursday, 7.08pm

Just came back from work and am eating a bowl of vege now. This whole week haven been sleeping well since last sat after drinking with Clement.. To sell tickets and for rehearsal or practice for my performance tml.. im seriously going to drop soon.. still standing because of band comittement for practise.. later i still have to go.. and i dont have the strength and the state of mind to play drums.. im merely playing using my skills now.. dont even have the energy to play with feelings.. my feeling now is tiredness..

Fuck camp. Fuck ns... FUck thAT bloODy edmund who likes to take mc. Fuck everything in camp. Fuck martin the black. im already at the top of blowing up in camp already.. just because of my swollen knucle, i cant punch the wall.. have nowhere else to vent my frustration on and no one who understands enough to share it to.. fuck everybody. Fuck everything in this bloody world. why cant anyone think? damn turn off by every shit stuff in this whole world. FUCK ALL...

~~FUCK OFF~~
!~JORDON~!

3:09 AM

Friday, January 19, 2007

19 Jan 2007, Friday. 7.14pm

Man~ im really tired of going back to camp already... but that to me, is the best place compared to all saf and RSAF because its super well facilitated and ive good bunch of friends there.. waS damn frustrated ytd till i told that martini that i wanna re vocat..Then he's like, YOU THINK SO EASY TO REVOCAT YOU AR~~! then after that talk to me nicely.. haha!! Stupid ass...

im starting to pity edmund for being so blur or acting blur as he got himself 4 extras.. hAHaha! Almost everyweek there'll be one day for him either for being late or for lying, or, doing things badly.. and for me, i got confined till 6pm tml for eating in the office ytd. LAME RIGHT?!?!?!?!
hMm...

I just wanna write about this girl... seriously.. never fails to come into my mind because she's just too attracting. Wrote in my army book about this lady.. well.. sometimes when things just got into your mind, you just gotta write it down ya?? haha... And yea, its all pleasant comments.. just cant think of any weaknesses she's got. Probably i dunno her well enough.. hMmm...
maybe there's one.. that is she always forgot to call me.. and kept me waiting and waiting through day and night.. man.. its really tiring.. haha!!

WEll laDy, its for you!! hAha..~!!

GOd blEsS all~!!

~~PEACE OUT~~
!~JORDON~!

3:14 AM

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

17 Jan 2007, Wednesday..

man... NS is really making me feel so stressed up already.. because of one who cant work.. AS the time of those who are gonna ORD comes nearer, im really getting very sad.. its not just the fun things that we do together.. its because i will have a lot of work load to shoulder... man.. sucks totally...

i will miss those who are gonna ord soon except for that gay shit... haiz... i feel that i should join ns earlier lor.. then i wont be in this mess.. probably woRsT!! haha.. gonna meet up with clement and probably some others for frog leg porridge this friday i think.. hMmm... are we??

i love the feeling of home now because it feel so clean and comfortable.. quite cosy.. just that it lack one tv and some companies around me. it will be better if there's another friend with me... chatting, sharing things in mind.. dont have to stuff it up like some nut in the ass... dennis just started sch and mokkie working.. shit man... those two are now busier than me if there're such a word.. feeling damn bored everyday just sitting down in my room using the computer alone.. the worst thing.. but its better to stay in camp with martin around... if there's no martin, life will be enjoyable and time will fly damn fast in ns for me.. probably 1 - 2 years will just pass probably by tml.. haha~~

miss all my friends... be gone asses..

God bless everyone..

~~PEACE OUT~~
!~JORDON~!

2:30 AM

Sunday, January 14, 2007

14th Jan 2007, Sunday 10pm.

wow.. i just clean up my room and change the structure of the furnitures. SHifted a rack outside and moved the computer and its table in. And my room look so well facilitated except for a TV... Man im gonna fix the cables into my room and buy a tv set next time.. but there's no more space cause of my drumset... AR!! lol...

Well, the drums still over at dennis' house so it look quite spacious now.. clean and good for sleeping... gonna have a good night slp tonight.. tml ive got a long day to go because while i was on course, MC king Edmund got into some trouble and got himself confined.. and me ang and him have to sit with Martini the black bandit at his table... dunno what to say also...

I just want to have the time, the chance to know you more... As one of my close friend. :) hope i have the chance...

God bless all..

~~PEACE OUT~~
!~JORDON~!

5:59 AM

14th Jan 2007, Sunday. Boring day cause ive got no activities on.. Suck to the core..

Well... was just thinking after i saw a friend's nick.. Music my passion.. oh man... Its my passion too.. but somehow the meaning of it just disappear.. although i still love music but there's no meaning... haiz... i want to regain this passion of mine. Having the discipline to train myself hard in the area of drumming.

NS just stuck me in one corner where there's nowhere to go.. Government suck... why do we have to go to ns and waste two years and during this process, letting all those talented people forgo their passion.. OH MAN!!!! suck...

Im still waiting for a call.. hAhaha!! pls pls. you're two days late already. lol...

God bless all..

~~PEACE OUT~~
!~JORDON~!

12:24 AM

Saturday, January 13, 2007

13th Jan 2007, Sunday, 12.20am

Yeah, finally my course had ended after one week of lousy facilities and lousy food at Sembawang Camp... And getting so little slp all the days at yishun. Oh man...

Ive got funny clique of friends there at S.C. But some are quite retarded... Well, i guess only Shawn the heck care man, Sun the soldier of the month and Jimmy the small, is the closest i guess.. Oh man, must ask them out one of this days already.

man... been smoking alot the last week cause i have too many breaks.. only the last two days i determine myself to smoke 5 sticks in the camp.. and getting superb heaty during that week. Nearly got a sore throat, and ive got lots of pimple popping out from my face already... ARH!!! gonna have redded face...

Home, the most comfortable place in the whole wide world. Ive got a comfortable bed and a cosy room to slp in. wahahaha...

Went to Jeremy's house ytd with Clement.. Man, HIS HOUSE IS DAMN FREAKING NICE!!! So cosy la! And he's got a basement thats like a lounge. Quiet and everything is sufficient like liquor, a large screen, disco ball and books, and a shooting duck game.. ahaha! then after that, he fetch the two of us home. at the speed of 140km/hr.. man.. i was enjoying the breeze from outside coming in from the open window. Cool mAn!!

THen when i reach home, i was already half dead. Then went to on the computer, bathe, then use the computer.. ahaha!

Was surprised to see belle coming online after me.. wahahaha!! Then chat lor... listen to music. And i just found out house music is damn nice. Clement intro it to me... and i went to download house music and put 5 in my hp and listened to it the whole day.. haha~ man it brings up my mood.. A relaxing feeling i got when i was listening...

and she dint call me today!!! not good ar girl.. you know who you are. haha!!

God bless everyone!

~~PEACE OUT~~
!~JORDON~!

8:18 AM

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Oh man.. its a boring day.. cause internet is super slow... caused by the taiwan earthquake... I wonder how earthquake is like... Probably i will go to a country with earthquake and experience it myself. Singaporean are just too blessed or fortunate because its at the equator where seriously, things are balanced. Including the weather. No snowy days or burning hot days where people get freeze to death or dehydrate to death. TOo blessed... Think i am too blessed also that when small things happens like when people ignore you, i will feel so disappointed.. Not a mature state of mind. But really.. ARmy really changes me. Now even when i look at some adult friends, i feel that their mentality is worst than small kids.. Lamers Inc.. Just dont understand why their mindset are set to this kind of stage. Yawnz..

Few days ago... I would feel very happy when she calls or messages me.. just dont understand why... and now.. Sometimes i will feel that it isnt a big deal. She's still human afterall and whats worst, i dont even know her personally.. Haven really know her enough. But she's really attractive. Attracted me the first time i saw her. With her personality..

Its sad to think that i have to go back to camp tomorrow!! Arhg!! suck to the core. And thank God 2006 is over. SInce the start of 2006, nothing had come good for me. Probably for many, that year isnt good either. I feel that 2003 is the best.. But whenever you're having loads of fun, time really flies like nobody's business. Had all the fun i had, doing lame but fun things, that really create the bond with my friends. Well, they are gone now. And there's left only like two whom i can really go to when im down. To really give me the time to share my stuff with them. Really, for this i thank God that at least He hasnt take them away.

Good part about tomorrow. MR MARTIN'S ON LEAVE TILL NEXT WEEK!! WOOHOO!! and everyone's back! at least i dont have to care about that gay sergeant. Fucking use his rank on me. Come on la... Rank in camp doesnt mean rank outside. Lets talk outside. Fucking gonna ORD come and give me all the shit. Fuck off man bitch. Even your dad knows you're gay. Faggot shit... yuck... If i got a chance, i will just give him a hard punch, One hard enough for him to turn him back to a normal GENDER THat He's bORn to be... Lame ass..

woOHoOo!!! Clement's back. Yeo Yuan Lun's back. Ang's there. wow.. gonna have load of fun time from tomorrow which is wednesday to friday. waHahahAHa!! And Mani ORD already.. Shit that Ord bastard. And when March comes, Clement's gonna ord.. sian la.. April Ang ord.. and i have to stick with that MC/bLUr king for 2 years! And november, YYL is gonna ord.. there goes all my chatting mates.. sian.. Well, Life's like that. Lame ass...

Gonna have a GIG for my sister's concert on the 26th Jan.. Hope Mokkie and the gang are coming.. haha..

~~Peace out~~ Jordon

4:23 AM