______________*****In nEeD Of MuSiC*****_____________

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

28th November 2006, Tuesday

WoOo~ CAmp waS fun today without mArtinO the lAtinO. Lol~ hE went for operation. And its super relaxing today! but sucks man... He's coming back tml la... Well, we had our fun time in the office... lol..

Today is like walking day.. So lame la.
As usual, Mani, Yuan Lun, Clement and me share cab home. The difference is that the taxi driver is superb Arrogant and Proud. Cant stand him la.. He actually drop Clement off 3 BUS STOPS AWAY!!! hAHa..! Clement was like so damn pissed off and while alighting, he was like pointing middle finger at us. hAha.. Then i got home, dint bathe first cause i will be going out later. I ate the noodle my mom cook and went to rest. Then cycled out to meet clement for smoke.

and FUCK!!! My bAck gear became loose and the whole bike just cant move! And i have to push my bike back for the second time. The first time was when a bloody banglah blocked my way and i have to like avoid clashing into him and TADA, my tire banged onto a kerb and my back tire go pOoF~! Then have to push it to Dennis' house... And i think the screw came out while i changed the tire at dennis' house.

But the funny part was for the past few days it was okay! and it always broke down at the same point. Just that it was further today. It was at Hougang C.C . The last time was at the swimming pool. lol~ And was talking to clement on the phone while walking home and we were saying that Thank God the bike dint break down at East Coast park or Changi. lol~ His friend's bike broke down at Novena church and he had to push all the way to AMK, CARRYING!! lol~ Thank God for me i cant push... hAha~

Am eating noodle now and then im gonna slp. Gonna push the whole computer table inside my room someday because my sister is really irritating me with all the shit like shutting down my computer when im sending my friend some files...

TATA, hope to see all my good friends someday~ mIss them alot.. God bless all!

6:07 AM

Monday, November 27, 2006

Hmmm... I was superb free after so long of tiredness from camp and going out. Although im still very tired, i dunno why i bother to go and play around the template of this blogspot thing. lol.. Its quite fun.. MY SKIN IS SUPERB SIMPLE AND NICE!!! AND BLACK!!! lol... Make myself de hor.. not bad for a computer dumb ass.. lol~~

Is my picture on the About me? lol.. Hope it is.. waHahaHahaHa!!

3:44 AM

Am just trying to load some pic. This is mE!! Quite a few months ago before enlistment. lol

3:32 AM

Saturday, November 25, 2006

Its 2.44 am on sunday. And im at mokkie's place. Am suppose to be slping cause im tired.. But everytime i go to somewhere comfortable, i just cant get to slp because too much things in my mind for me to think about.

I use to tell people that its better to have something on your mind than a blank mind, which is daydreaming and you cant be bothered with anything around you. Well... I still agree to that.. But just that sometimes you just gotta spend the time thinking resting...

Life is just full of pretence. Even myself. My mindset has seriously changed. I dont know how it change.. I just cant be bothered about some stuff. Mostly lame stuff which people use to laugh at something which is not funny. Is this the so call mature mind? Maybe in the process..

I use to be so damn childish about my thinking... But after i got enlisted, i see a different me. Compared to last time, im not as lazy as last time. Maybe sometimes when im sick like these few days. hmm... Sometimes i just need a friend like everyone else is hoping for. I used to have friends which i can really call them Friend... But it seems like even time can take away all that because of stuffs that i dont really know...

My life is quite confusing but yet simple because there really isnt anything exciting. Its very plain and its easy to understand. But my heart is messy.. Hmmm.. Whats life... its seems so boring... Or rather, its really boring... Just cant stand the boredom that i have to live with everyday.... With phobia at home, and phobia of loneliness. Im always trying to just go out with anyone.. Even those whom i dont really know... Who dont even understand what kind of person i was...

17 this year.. and i have seen quite abit... But there is still many things to learn.. But i guess its enough for me. Trying everytime to make someone happy even if it makes me really turn off... Maybe i should just make myself happy.. lol.. or sometimes i wish that they can think of what others are thinking of how they feel.. I just dont get it...

going to smoke and slp already.. gonna relax my mind...
good day friends..

and If you're really troubled with things and need someone who can understand you, why not approach me? :) not harm trying. God bless all¬¬

10:51 AM

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Things on my mind..

I've always wanted to know whats the meaning of living.. There's just something that missing in my heart.. Constantly.. Everytime when ive done something which i want like buying stuff, i dont feel the sense of satisfaction. Even after my wallet and handphone was found..

What do i need... I dont have a fulfilled life.

Just saw something while browsing through some stuff.. Suddenly i feel a deep fear and sadness just pump up from my heart.. i dunno whats that feeling but i definitely know what it was.. i just closed it immediately..

I need someone. Someone more than a friend. Someone who will listen to me all the time.. someone who will console me and really care for me. Is it too much? Maybe im just thinking like some big asshole..

Thinking of what clement said... A Peace of Mind.. Is this the so call maturity in this world? Something that will keep you alive even when you're alone? I just cant live alone.. I need lots of companions. Really good friends.

Often i envy those people who have really good friends because i dont have...

Probably its God? But ive tried it... I dont feel good.. maybe i just dint serve Him well enough thats why.. There's a hole in my heart. What can it be to cover it so that i will feel satisfied.. Whats going on in my heart... Trying to be cheerful, crazy and all... Its just bullshit.

Trying to pretend my way through... But i cant pretend to myself. Sometimes i wish i could and just maybe pretend until the day i die...

Where's heaven... It seems to be a place thats really difficult to go to... When your heart is just abit off, Hell you go... yeah.. its really hard..

How can i have the peace of mind....?

5:52 AM

Saturday, November 04, 2006

Lol~ there's nothing to say actually. But since its been so long since i blog, i will just blog for fun for once..

Hmm... Since thursday, i haven been having enough slp. Cause weihoong aka mokkie came over at around 2+ and stayed until 3+ to 4. Then early in the morning about 6, i have to go camp already.. haha.. was like a zombie in camp. Then after camp, i just came home and just eat my favourite and most memoriable food. Dry Ban Mian. About erm.. 9 to 10, went over to mokkie's house to slp. But its also quite "early" la. ABout 2+. dennis is suppose to wake me up at 3 to go for supper!

When i woke up, it was so bright already. I was like blurred for a moment.. Then i rmb i have to go to camp. Its seven in the morning already. Haha.. just brush my teeth and then ran outside to take a cab to camp. Was worst than the previous day. hAha~ then stupid mani act his rank as a corporal and shouted at me. Then i scolded him the pussy word. lol~

Its friday la.. Then went back to yishun to get my handphone back from my father. Ate there at the coffee shop. Then went up to my aunt's house to bathe. Went o 925 to meet up with some of my friends and went to bugis for pool. Thank goodness one of them drive. So i went over to mokkie's house again cause he needs some refreshment. Then i stayed over again. lol~

Today sat, went over to dennis' house for Serene's 21 birthday. I just somehow create a song for her. and she said it was nice! haha... get it from dennis if you wanna listen to it. Was quite bored there la..

Saw this girl name deborah.. she was attractive man.. but its not time yet to flirt around or for any relationship craps... Just not ready and im not working yet. So yea... lol~

Now at home.. quite bored.. mAn she's really all in my mind. Another girl not deb.. lol~

You will never know how much you love someone until you two are separated.
Cruel but true....

God bless you people~

8:39 AM