Sunday, August 27, 2006
bEen lying on my bed since 4 or earlier.. but i just cant get to slp.. until like 5am now.. i just feel a sudden feeling of lost-ness. i just wonder why memories just start to flow back one by one... it really sucks when there're super good memories but you cant hold on to them forever.. and its like the opposite situation as compared to those memories. i just cant imagine that i'm being bless with so many good friends and those people around me. but i've lost them just like that.. hAiz..
memories... memories...
my mind just keep thinking about them when i dont want to.. because it can really make me cry... feeling so lost.. feeling so empty.. whats life man.. whats friends.. whats family..
what good does it make to follow my God... i cant even follow Him well... ARhG~ such a failure.. im sure God is crying for me... all the while being so disappointed because of someone that He love so much.. how can i ever comprehend God, how can i even comprehend the meaning of following christ... bACkslided piece of shiT...
doing things that really puts my body down... is it worth it? whats the use of knowing but yet cant control it... nobody really cares.. thats the problem... because i dont hAVe a goal, or i dont live for anyone. thats why i dont really care.. i use to live for the person i love, controlling myself.. but now i dont have.. and i dont live for anyone.. whose my target..? its painful... seriously...
2:11 PM
me, myself Name: Jordon Lee Weisheng
Age: 18 in 2007
Date of birth: 22nd June 1989
Location: Singapore
Email: windweisheng@hotmail.com
Hp: 91509875
